Basketball On The Internet.

NO huge surprises in February as far as awards go. Argo won for Best Picture and the Oscar went to ... Wollongong, after stints in New Zealand and Adelaide.

(Word is he will stay a Hawk too, if you were wondering.)

But the NBL Oscar for Player of the Month went to ... drumroll please ... Cedric Jackson. Cue applause and brisk walk to stage.

"Thank you, thank you all. I don't know what to say. Let me think, I don't want to leave anyone out.

"Um, first, I want to thank my agent for getting me this gig. I knew it had potential even though it was going to be a remake of the sequel to Breaker-Breaker. But we had so much fun making the sequel last year that I thought: 'hey, why not go for a third'? And no, I don't believe in the so-called 'Godfather' curse just because Godfather III was a turkey.

"Oops, sorry Francis Ford Coppola, Al Pacino - love your work guys.

"But when I spoke with (director) Andrej Lemanis - and, as Arnold Schwarzenegger said about Ivan Reitmann, Andrej is a genius - and he said he could see me in a starring role this year in Breaker III, well, I had no idea I would end up here, holding Oscar. So thank you for believing in me Andrej.

"Uh, who else? Yeah, I wanna thank the rest of the cast and crew - you know who you are - and a shout-out to my main man Gary Wilkinson, wherever you are. Um, um..."

Cue music.

"Oh yeah and very quickly ... please stop playing the play-out music ... but very quickly to Will Hudson. We were only kidding with that 'break a leg' thing man. It's just a showbiz term."

Music louder.

"Oh and to all the other nominees, it's a privilege to know you and ... (muffled noises)" as Jackson is led from the podium by special guests Luc Longley and Andrew Bogut.

 
THE nominations for best director for February are: Shane Heal for "Rebel Without a Cause", the story of one man's efforts to kickstart an ailing franchise; Chris Anstey for "Dazed and Confused" a twisted tale of a group of armed men in sight of their goal who instead shoot themselves in the foot; Marty Clarke for "Clueless", the steady dismantling of a storied franchise; Andrej Lemanis for "To Sir, With Love", a teacher's efforts to explain the correct usage of vowels to a team of troubled "wunners"; and Rob Beveridge for "The Shiners", a classic remake of "The Shining" but with Shawn Redhage and Jesse Wagstaff sharing the Jack Nicholson role, terrorising a deserted league.

And the envelope please.

Sorry?

Oh. Apparently Rob Beveridge has been pushing the envelope lately - a little Seth McFarlane humor for you there folks... And the Oscar goes to: Rob Beveridge.

Cue applause as Rob runs onto the stage to receive his 'gong from the Gong's Gordie McLeod.

"Wow. Thank you.

"Just ... wow.

"You know, I have to say, I wouldn't be up here if it wasn't for the love and encouragement of ... sorry ... I, I said I wasn't going to be emotional but ... this person has stuck with me through thick and thin ... sorry, I'll be OK in a second ... (blows nose) ... Phew. Ok. I'll start again.

"I just want to say, this, this is as much yours as it is mine Shawn, Shawn Dennis. I love you mate. It wouldn't mean anything without you.

"To the cast and crew, the boys behind the scenes like Nick Marvin, Andy Stewart, Adam Tatalovich, Will Markwick, to Damo, Shawno, Jesso, Lischo, Camo, Knightie... oh, oh, I know I've left some of you out but you know who you are, Rhyso, I'm sorry if I've forgotten any of you but I'll speak to you personally when I get the chance.

"Just thank you, thank you all. You know, it's our job to keep this sport clean and played by the rules - yeah, yeah, I know some of you are shaking your heads - but we can do it, we can do it.

"And we will lead the way! Thank you again. Thank you to the Academy, Larry Sengstock, Marc Howard, Di Smith-Gander...." (Rest obscured as loud music plays him off, escorted out by Brian Kerle and Cal Stamp.

OK. Thank heavens award season is over.
 

ADRIS "2Quick2Stop" Deleon is this round's Player of the Week, just when you thought it was safe to peek back into the NBL race.

It was Deleon's third PotW accolade after he hit 31 points with eight assists and seven rebounds for Wollongong to clinch a key win 88-82 over Melbourne in Melbourne.

Deleon was 7-of-13 from the floor, including 5-of-8 dialing long distance, and 12-of-14 from the stripe.

Sydney guard Ben Madgen would have been close behind, with a career-high 33 points on 13-of-22 shooting, plus eight rebounds, five assists and three steals as the Kings also won a key fixture 83-67 over Townsville.

Not to mention rookie Cam Gliddon had 26 points on 8-of-13 shooting, six boards and five steals as Cairns upset Perth. Oh wait. I guess I just did mention it.


Rankings

This Week ... Prev

8 (8) CROCODILES - Have run out of steam and look bound for the bomb shelter.

7 (4) 36ERS - Mini-run ground to a sudden halt but can move again this week.

6 (3) TIGERS - That hurt and it doesn't get any easier this week. Dangerous times.

5 (6) KINGS - Great win but will take one to the gut this week in Perth.

4 (7) TAIPANS - Need a split at least to remain "upwardly mobile".

3 (5) HAWKS - So much character but facing a "spoiler" in its own building.

2 (1) WILDCATS - Form has to dip now and then but Kings will suffer the rebound.

1 (2) BREAKERS - I'm hearing the old Sade song... "Smooth operator..."


THIS WEEK'S TIPS

NEW Zealand took care of business in its own inimitable fashion last round while Cairns took the chocolates off the Breakers' main opponent Perth. Even good teams are inclined to dip occasionally so I'm tipping a boilover in Auckland and another Taipans upset.

Apart from early this season when it finally lost its first game, then inexplicably suffered a run of consecutive "outs", Perth historically is excellent at rebounding from a loss by belting its next opponent. So here's a big Wildcats welcome to Perth Arena for the Sydney Kings. Ben Madgen? Meet Damian Martin.

Townsville has lost its way now but knowing it can still determine the shape of the final four and with players still having 2013-14 contracts to play for, they must fire up for Wollongong. There's a history between these clubs to boot and while the Hawks were great in beating Melbourne last week, the Tigers were down import Seth Scott and, eventually, Jonny Rotten, er...Flynn. This is a big one for Wollongong but if Townsville cannot get the upset here, it may not win another game this season.

Adelaide was brought back to earth with a thud by New Zealand but Cairns is an entirely different type of beast. In the 36ers' favor is this is their last home game at Adelaide Arena, making it the last chance to see this particular version of the team. That should bring a few of the faithful out but with so much to play for, Cairns should sneak in.

Melbourne will be hoping to have a full squad to select from as it faces another threat to its post-season plans against New Zealand. With Will Hudson still out, the Tigers can play to their size advantage and you must give them a real shot at an upset. That is, of course, until "bonehead central" kicks in and someone gets an unsportsmanlike foul, then a technical...


THE Jolly Green Giant, Kermit the Frog, the Hulk and three Martians walk into a bar. The barman looks up from where he is cleaning glasses, stares at them and says: "What is this, some kind of a joke?"